Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Mom website-aholics 12 Step Program

1. We need to admit that we are powerless over our mom website, that our household messes have become unmanageable- but we don't feel like it.

2. We should come to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore our sanity- but we don't want to, plus we enjoy our insanity.

3. We're supposed to make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand Him- but God is too busy to plan play dates and Mom's Night Outs for us.

4. We may have to make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. But that would take time away from starting discussions and posting.

5. We will admit to our DH's, DD's, DS's, LO's, SO's, BF's*, ourselves, and to other human acronyms the exact nature of our wrongs- wait, it's wrong to be a mom website addict?

6. We are entirely ready to have God remove all the defects of character- screw that, we're happy with our defective addiction.

7. We could humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings but the keyboard doesn't have any more room for "F" buttons.

8. When we find the time, we'll make a list of all the persons we've harmed blown off and become willing to make amends to them all- as long as they agree to join our mom website.

9. When we're finished going through all our open tabs with discussions we must comment on we will make amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others- or if there's a chat and win contest going on.

10. We will continue to take personal inventory and when we are wrong promptly admit it- then immediately start a new discussion to vent about it.

11. We'll seek through prayer discussions to improve our conscious contact with God our mom website as we understand it, praying commenting on our knowledge of His will for us our growing ability to navigate the site with ease and the power to become an expert poster.

12. If we ever decide to pull ourselves away from our mom website we'll have a spiritual awakening as a result of completing these steps- and a cleaner house. We'll try to carry this message to new members, to practice these principles in all affairs, and to drag whoever we can deep into the depths of the mom website addiction.

Adapted from Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc by Kaytii Angel

* DH- dear husband, DD- dear daughter, DS- dear son, LO- little one, SO- significant other, BF- boyfriend