Monday, May 18, 2009

The Golden Rule

Treat others how you want to be treated.

Eight simple words when linked together make such a powerful statement.

The first time I heard these words I was in elementary school. I remember hearing them one day over the loud speaker during the morning announcements. Then the mysterious voice coming through the ceiling informed us that we needed to remember these words. If the principal saw us in the hall he may stop us and ask us to recite The Golden Rule. I saw him later that day and ducked into the bathroom terrified he would ask me as I wasn't sure I had memorized it, yet.

I have tried to live my life by this rule as well as raising my four children to live by it as well. As much as I hate to admit it I have not always treated others how I wish to be treated. I must remember that I am human and make mistakes (and I make a lot of them). When I am able, I ask the person I have hurt for their forgiveness even if it was a stranger. Some move on before I can ask them to forgive me. Most importantly, I ask forgiveness from God. He is the one who will decide if I will be allowed into Heaven to join my baby boy. I have to remind myself of this in times when I'm being criticized by others. My loyalty is to one and one only, God.

In my lifetime I have been called selfish, uncaring, a bitch, a whore, fake, mean, ugly, a bastard, malicious, and many other hurtful things. In almost every occasion in which I have been called an unkind name it was the result of someone else's insecurities or in a heated argument.

In my lifetime I have been called loving, caring, selfless, amazing, beautiful, kind, sincere, open, transparent, inspiring, and many other wonderful words. In almost every occasion in which I have been called a kind name it was the result of me in a shining moment. I am proud to say that my shining moments far outweigh my unkind moments.

I have built some amazing friendships and relationships by just being me. Some have chosen not to be my friend because our personalities have caused us to clash. I have written many posts about my loves and relationships. I've opened myself up to the world. I've exposed my heart to complete strangers in every corner of the earth. Why? Because of all the names I've been called, good or bad, the one I've heard the most is "giving." I give myself to you, my readers, in hopes that I may be able to help just one person.

It is my vision to help an adoptee make the decision to search for his/her biological parents, or to not and be happy with the family they have. It is my dream to reach out to those who want to make themselves healthier through eating better and exercising. It is my goal to touch one person who struggles as a parent and let them know I share their frustrations. It is my life that I choose to expose to hold the hand of a mother who has had to bury their child as I have had to bury my own.

Where is all of this coming from? My heart. I need not do any research for this post. I have no need to cite the source where the words have derived from. This is my soul, my heart, my everything that I give to you in hopes to make your life happier, healthier, painless.

If there were a camera attached to my monitor what you would see right now would be a solemn face streaked with tears. The last few days have been bipolar. Friday night I hit a very high high in having the chance to spend time with my biological dad. Saturday morning I reached a very low low at the Walk Like MADD. Wonderful memories of Kevin and Stephanie filled my head, memories that will always be alive in me even though they are no longer alive. Joy filled me as I thought of my sister-in-law and nephew who survived. Then the pain of my loss hit. My heart was pierced further listening to a wife who lost her husband when their daughter was only eight months old. A little girl who has overcome many obstacles and has many more as she survived the accident that killed her mother.

I was hit again learning that I'd upset my bio-dad to the point where he almost went home. Fortunately he stayed and we had an amazing day. He was able to see his oldest grandchild shine by herself and has learned to love her even more. We were blessed to hear Steven Curtis Chapman at Busch Gardens and arrived just in time to hear him sing "God is God." This song hit us both elevating our happiness to an extreme high.

This past weekend caused me to take a good look at my life and my actions. If I were to pick my life apart I would find several situations that I would choose to erase or go back and do differently. But those experiences have helped to form the person you read about when you log into my blog. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am. I learn from the mistakes I make in order to help myself become a better person. In turn, this makes me a better mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, etc. Learning from my mistakes helps me to love better and have stronger relationships.

Out of this jumbled mess of words I hope you are able to take away something positive. I hope that you take some time to look deep into yourself. Are you being the best person you can be? Or are you being rude, slanderous, or flat out mean? Are you living your life by The Golden Rule? Stop. Look. Listen. Reflect. Love. And give.

The picture was taken a few days after Hurricane Andrew hit Homestead, Fl. It was a beautiful sunrise amidst severe devastation. I felt blessed to travel there and assist in the clean-up.

1 comment: